More than a year after initiating my divorce, old and harmful ways of thinking about my body are marring my new chapter. It's time to turn the page and redefine my concept of beauty.
Another open-hearted share, Amy. Thought-provoking and much food for thought. You sparked an idea in your exchange with Kristin! Her words, 'standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations'
I love that you enjoyed it including my exchange with my wonderful friend Kristin. You will be hearing more from her and about her when I bring her on as a podcast guest in the future. I will make sure she sees your note to her.
As a Narrative Therapy Practitioner & (Narrative Coach) I begin by acknowledging the many layers of external influence that often become internal:
I'm a 56 year old woman always in recovery from a 25 abusive relationship with exercise anorexia.
I'm a survivor of childhood sexual assault, and a survivor of the incredibly toxic thin body culture messaging.
I'm a survivor of the insanity of airbrushed ads and stick thin images that we were/are told are beauty.
And wow, do I resonate with your post!
And, since 2020. I no longer go to the gym for weight lifting, so I've lost muscle tone and have what my cousin calls, 'Bingo wings" < the lose flesh under one's triceps that wiggle when one waves their arms. 😅
A Narrative Practice I Love is: acts of resistance. The idea that accepting my aging body, Bingo wings and cellulite butt and crows feet and all as standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations of beauty feels Liberating!
When I presented Keynotes for Love your Body Day I asked the audience to list what they Loved about their body: my example was, I love that my knees still work after years of abuse by aerobics! 😀
I love that my eyes shine green like a cat.
I love thst my organs function and keep me breathing and my blood flowing...
You get the idea.
I wonder, what do You love about your body?♡
And Amy. I Love your shared practice of loving our own bodies as we love a baby's.♡
Where Jonathan Adler shares the concepts of redemption and contamination sequences. Fascinating.
In the past, I reviewed and curated a narrative to support my career discussions. I now use similar exercises to affirm that my actions align with my core values. In my discussions with other carers who often find themselves 'sleepwalking' into full-time care - they struggle with their identity & self-worth. Do you have suggestions for books or exercises similar to the one you've suggested here? Especially related to "standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations" - This would be a fabulous aid for caregivers who are subjected to expectations of society/friends/family AND their inner critic. I'd welcome any suggestions that I could share with others.
Kristin, how I ADORE this comment and you, wise friend! So many layers, it is true. When it comes to the insanity of the ads and images you mention, we females are all survivors. I appreciate your refusal to do the weight lifting--resistance to resistance training! Woot woot! Had no idea they were called bingo wings but I've got a pair myself. And the love your body exercise--this is an empowering challenge. Thank you for sharing it.
I love my brown eyes.
I love my strong legs that can lift and squat and carry.
I love the softness of my skin.
I love the way my smile lights up my mother's face.
I love my arms because they are so good at hugging.
I love my curves.
Wow, this was so much fun! I hope others in the comments join in!
Amy, I'm glad all this information and inspirations converged to help you in your struggle with body image. Here's too greater acceptance of the wholeness of who we are and what we embody. xo
Another open-hearted share, Amy. Thought-provoking and much food for thought. You sparked an idea in your exchange with Kristin! Her words, 'standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations'
I love that you enjoyed it including my exchange with my wonderful friend Kristin. You will be hearing more from her and about her when I bring her on as a podcast guest in the future. I will make sure she sees your note to her.
What a fantastic newsletter, Amy. Very thoughtful and thought provoking.
As a Narrative Therapy Practitioner & (Narrative Coach) I begin by acknowledging the many layers of external influence that often become internal:
I'm a 56 year old woman always in recovery from a 25 abusive relationship with exercise anorexia.
I'm a survivor of childhood sexual assault, and a survivor of the incredibly toxic thin body culture messaging.
I'm a survivor of the insanity of airbrushed ads and stick thin images that we were/are told are beauty.
And wow, do I resonate with your post!
And, since 2020. I no longer go to the gym for weight lifting, so I've lost muscle tone and have what my cousin calls, 'Bingo wings" < the lose flesh under one's triceps that wiggle when one waves their arms. 😅
A Narrative Practice I Love is: acts of resistance. The idea that accepting my aging body, Bingo wings and cellulite butt and crows feet and all as standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations of beauty feels Liberating!
When I presented Keynotes for Love your Body Day I asked the audience to list what they Loved about their body: my example was, I love that my knees still work after years of abuse by aerobics! 😀
I love that my eyes shine green like a cat.
I love thst my organs function and keep me breathing and my blood flowing...
You get the idea.
I wonder, what do You love about your body?♡
And Amy. I Love your shared practice of loving our own bodies as we love a baby's.♡
Hi Kristin, life connections are turning up here through this beautiful article from Amy!
I recently listened to a 'Hidden Brain' Podcast episode and was introduced to Narrative Psychology (https://www.carermentor.com/p/recommendation-hidden-brains-change)
Where Jonathan Adler shares the concepts of redemption and contamination sequences. Fascinating.
In the past, I reviewed and curated a narrative to support my career discussions. I now use similar exercises to affirm that my actions align with my core values. In my discussions with other carers who often find themselves 'sleepwalking' into full-time care - they struggle with their identity & self-worth. Do you have suggestions for books or exercises similar to the one you've suggested here? Especially related to "standing up in powerful defiance to the rigid societal/cultural/gender expectations" - This would be a fabulous aid for caregivers who are subjected to expectations of society/friends/family AND their inner critic. I'd welcome any suggestions that I could share with others.
Kristin, how I ADORE this comment and you, wise friend! So many layers, it is true. When it comes to the insanity of the ads and images you mention, we females are all survivors. I appreciate your refusal to do the weight lifting--resistance to resistance training! Woot woot! Had no idea they were called bingo wings but I've got a pair myself. And the love your body exercise--this is an empowering challenge. Thank you for sharing it.
I love my brown eyes.
I love my strong legs that can lift and squat and carry.
I love the softness of my skin.
I love the way my smile lights up my mother's face.
I love my arms because they are so good at hugging.
I love my curves.
Wow, this was so much fun! I hope others in the comments join in!
Oooh Wonderful list!!! So glad this idea resonated with you, you beautiful human being!♡
Amy, I'm glad all this information and inspirations converged to help you in your struggle with body image. Here's too greater acceptance of the wholeness of who we are and what we embody. xo
Thank you Louisa. Here's to wholeness!